Tweedle Beetle Tri-Atheletle

Merry Christmas Everyone,

Well, the hysterics are calmed, the blizzard of wrapping paper recycled, the gun fire from Buz Lightyear has quieted and the whistles from the new, high tech automated steam engine have slowed to a stop.  One child is asleep and the other has been forced into quiet playtime (with the condition that he can hold watch his "New" Car's DVD while sitting quietly).  Our living room is fraught with toys, Christmas underwear, Train Tables and Thomas The Train tracks.  While we probably should be picking up and reorganizing our space to accommodate all of these newly acquired items - us grownups have decided to retire for a bit of rest ourselves.

While I can't speak for everyone, I received a truely unexpected and terribly wonderful gift this morning.  As a stocking stuffer, I received a new cycling magazine (ROAD - The Journal of Road Cycling and Culture).  In an attempt to escape for a few moments from the chaos of Christmas Morning, I opened to an article ( The Pablove Foundation: A Father, a Son and a bike. By John Madruga) and began to read.  What I read brought me to tears at our kitchen table, witnessed by my wife and mother in law - and is continuing to bring me to tears as I write this.  It was a story about a father, who in discovering his 4 year old son's rare form of cancer and subsequent passing on June 27th, 2009 starts a wonderful foundation called pablove.org and continues to blog about his experiences, thoughts and emotions as he deals with his tragic loss (PLEASE VISIT THIS HIS BLOG - http://getwellpablo.blogspot.com/).

During my reading, my crying and my grieving for a man and his son, whom I have never met - I received a wonderful and unexpected gift.  As I watch my 4 year old son get frustrated with his new Thomas The Train track set, I became truly terrified with the realization that both of my sons' lifes, my wife's life and my life are not guaranteed and are finite.  I became terrified that I too might loose those that I love, infinitely more times than anything else in my life.  The terror though subsided and was replaced with a feeling of true gratitude, a feeling of serenity and of peace.

I am grateful that at this moment, this day, I am blessed.  Rather than living in terror of what might happen, I will (at lest for today) live in the moment and appreciate what I have.

 I received a gift today of Serenity.  The type of serenity that comes from living in the most immediate presence.  Living without fear of the future nor guilt or regret of the past.  In the present, I find peace.

Most of all though I realized that my greatest gift is my family.  To my boys and my wife - I love you all so much. 

Thank you Pablo and Thank you Jeff.  The passing of this wonderful child will not be in veign - even in death, Pablo has been granted with the power to make another Son's and Father's relationship more powerful and fulfilling.  Your family will be in our prayers and thoughts.  I prey that you and your family also find peace today.  I prey that your family will also have a Merry Christmas.